This list was spread across mailboxes a while ago - and it's all TRUE. My comments are inline.
1. When crossing the street, you sprint.
Historically so. Recently penalties for drivers improved the situation and at least in Moscow drivers might wait when you cross. What's interesting: my husband, who is a driver, once payed a penalty, now he always wait for people to cross. Most of people does not believe he let'll them cross and looked at car like he stopped to ran over.
2. In winter, you choose your route first by determining which icicles
are least likely to impale you on the head.
Not fun. This winter my friend has seen a man killed by icicle in the city centre in my hometown. No such danger in Moscow though.
3. You give a 10% tip only if the waiter has been really
exceptional...meaning he/she smiled or said hello, got up from
their chair to take your order, got your order right, and the
restaurant actually had what was on the menu.
Yep. If restaurant doesn't cost you arm and leg, such service is truly exceptional.
5. You save table scraps for the pack of wild dogs living in the
courtyard.
Mom does it. I don't. Yet.
6. You plan your vacation around those times of the year when they
turn off the hot water.
2 weeks on summer without hot water - in Moscow, up to 2 month - in regions.
7. 'Девушка! почему в блюде укропa нет!?' (Why is there no dill in the meal?!)
8. 'Da net!' becomes a logical and useful phrase
Ha ) Yes ) It means "Most likely - no"
9. You let the telephone ring at least 3-4 times before you pick it up
because it is probably a mis-connection or electric fault.
10. You hear the radio say it is just at or below freezing outside and
you think it might be nice day for a change.
Last several years weather is strange. I have seen green grass in January, I have seen thermometer dropping or jumping 15 degrees within a week.
11. You argue with a taxi driver about a fare of 40 rubles ($1.10) to
go 2-3 miles while it is snowing.
12. You win a shoving match with an old Babuschka for a place in line
and you are proud of it.
13. You hesitate to put on your seat belt to avoid offending the
taxidriver and the impending 5 minute conversation to explain why
you are putting it on.
Yep, they are always offended. And there's no way to explain it if you do it on the back seat.
14. You are pleasantly surprised when there is actually toilet paper
in the bathroom.
In the public bathroom. =)
15. You look at people's shoes to determine where they are from.
I usually don't, but exersize it doable.
16. You're anxiously concerned because you forgot your "just in case"
disposable hypodermic needle in your other coat.
17. You "automatically" hand in your pepper spray at the door before
going through the metal detector.
=) Pepper and gas mix is better. Never used.
18. Your day seems brighter after seeing that goon's Mercedes run into
by a pensioner's "Moskvich".
Tons of jokes are about it
19. You are thrown off guard when the doorman at the nightclub is
happy to see you.
20. You wonder what the tax inspector really wants when she says
everything is in order.
21. You say he/she is "on the meeting".
*blushes*
22. You have to think twice about throwing away the empty instant
coffee jar.
an old joke: "- Darling, I can't find sugar, where it is?
- Dear, it's obvious! On the 3rd shelf, in a coffee jar with "salt" on it"
23. You're offended when your American friend gives you a "dozen"
roses.
Never even numbers. I'll post about it later.
24. You don't notice that Sony sticker on the front of your t.v.
25. You are relieved when the guy standing next to you on the bus
actually uses Kleenex.
26. You are envious when your friends door keys fit in their pocket.
27. You ask for no ice in your drink.
28. When you stop using "poshol" as a "to go" verb.
will comment but only if it raise interest.
29. When you go mushroom and berry picking out of necessity, not
recreation.
30. When you develop a liking for beets or cabbage.
Hate beet.
31. When you eat hot dogs for breakfast.
That's a lie. =)
32. When you drink the brine from empty pickle jars.
33. When you can read bar-codes.
34. When you start shopping for products by their country of
production.
Don't you do it too?
35. When you start to "feel" public transport and bridge opening
schedules.
36. When you know more than 60 Olgas.
37. When it doesn't seem strange to publicly relieve yourself.
Disagree.
38. When the question... "Would you like fries with that?" has been
replaced by.."Would you like bread with that?".
39. When your soup arrives with sour cream in it and you like it.
40. When you go to a restaurant and you play with the kitchen cat.
41. When you realize you have eaten an entire plate of meat product
and not questioned its origin.
42. When your internet connection hits 40K and you are excitied
because it hasn't been that high in over a month.
Improving. No such thing in Moscow and broadbans is actively spreading in regions.
43. When you buy a bottle of Panteen Pro-V and you are shocked when
the shampoo that comes out IS actually Panteen Pro-V.
44. You stare at the innostrantsii (outsiders) wandering around town
45. You ride the marshrutka shouting 'ostanovite na ostanovke' EXACTLY where you want to stop, and not worrying about handing your money to the driver via 6 people
46. You don't think about wearing your stilettoes to the club... when it's -20 outside
47. You don't get it when your parents laugh if you order 'sock' (сок=juice) in a restaurant
48. You keep typing 'н' instead of 'n'
49. You appreciatively murmur 'bogatstvo russkovo iazika' (rich russian language) when you learn a new irregular plural
50. You actually start to use the prefixes with verbs of motion
51. You talk with your Russian neighbour about 'those Europeans' in the ballet interval
52. You are impressed with the new model Lada or Volga.
Never. We call them a comstruction set or "do-it-yourself" sometimes
53. You start to say oiy, akh, ekh
54. Your friend asks you how your day was and you shake your head and say 'voobshey'
55. You know which diminutive your friends prefer according to mood
56. You shove in front of that damn bab to get the last carton of kefir
57. You get suspiscious when someone smiles at you (rightly so).
here is what I have for this topic
58. You start measuring in km, kg, and, koneshno, sto gramms!
59. You realize that potato is a polezna and appropriate pirog filling
60. You join the queue at the ticket booth according to what time the tekhnicheski pererivs take place at each one
61. You mutter 'Дурак' at the idiot who forgot the gherkins when they bought vodka
62. You carry a plastic shopping bag with you "just in case".
63. You know you're going to miss everything so much when you leave
=)
1. When crossing the street, you sprint.
Historically so. Recently penalties for drivers improved the situation and at least in Moscow drivers might wait when you cross. What's interesting: my husband, who is a driver, once payed a penalty, now he always wait for people to cross. Most of people does not believe he let'll them cross and looked at car like he stopped to ran over.
2. In winter, you choose your route first by determining which icicles
are least likely to impale you on the head.
Not fun. This winter my friend has seen a man killed by icicle in the city centre in my hometown. No such danger in Moscow though.
3. You give a 10% tip only if the waiter has been really
exceptional...meaning he/she smiled or said hello, got up from
their chair to take your order, got your order right, and the
restaurant actually had what was on the menu.
Yep. If restaurant doesn't cost you arm and leg, such service is truly exceptional.
5. You save table scraps for the pack of wild dogs living in the
courtyard.
Mom does it. I don't. Yet.
6. You plan your vacation around those times of the year when they
turn off the hot water.
2 weeks on summer without hot water - in Moscow, up to 2 month - in regions.
7. 'Девушка! почему в блюде укропa нет!?' (Why is there no dill in the meal?!)
8. 'Da net!' becomes a logical and useful phrase
Ha ) Yes ) It means "Most likely - no"
9. You let the telephone ring at least 3-4 times before you pick it up
because it is probably a mis-connection or electric fault.
10. You hear the radio say it is just at or below freezing outside and
you think it might be nice day for a change.
Last several years weather is strange. I have seen green grass in January, I have seen thermometer dropping or jumping 15 degrees within a week.
11. You argue with a taxi driver about a fare of 40 rubles ($1.10) to
go 2-3 miles while it is snowing.
12. You win a shoving match with an old Babuschka for a place in line
and you are proud of it.
13. You hesitate to put on your seat belt to avoid offending the
taxidriver and the impending 5 minute conversation to explain why
you are putting it on.
Yep, they are always offended. And there's no way to explain it if you do it on the back seat.
14. You are pleasantly surprised when there is actually toilet paper
in the bathroom.
In the public bathroom. =)
15. You look at people's shoes to determine where they are from.
I usually don't, but exersize it doable.
16. You're anxiously concerned because you forgot your "just in case"
disposable hypodermic needle in your other coat.
17. You "automatically" hand in your pepper spray at the door before
going through the metal detector.
=) Pepper and gas mix is better. Never used.
18. Your day seems brighter after seeing that goon's Mercedes run into
by a pensioner's "Moskvich".
Tons of jokes are about it
19. You are thrown off guard when the doorman at the nightclub is
happy to see you.
20. You wonder what the tax inspector really wants when she says
everything is in order.
21. You say he/she is "on the meeting".
*blushes*
22. You have to think twice about throwing away the empty instant
coffee jar.
an old joke: "- Darling, I can't find sugar, where it is?
- Dear, it's obvious! On the 3rd shelf, in a coffee jar with "salt" on it"
23. You're offended when your American friend gives you a "dozen"
roses.
Never even numbers. I'll post about it later.
24. You don't notice that Sony sticker on the front of your t.v.
25. You are relieved when the guy standing next to you on the bus
actually uses Kleenex.
26. You are envious when your friends door keys fit in their pocket.
27. You ask for no ice in your drink.
28. When you stop using "poshol" as a "to go" verb.
will comment but only if it raise interest.
29. When you go mushroom and berry picking out of necessity, not
recreation.
30. When you develop a liking for beets or cabbage.
Hate beet.
31. When you eat hot dogs for breakfast.
That's a lie. =)
32. When you drink the brine from empty pickle jars.
33. When you can read bar-codes.
34. When you start shopping for products by their country of
production.
Don't you do it too?
35. When you start to "feel" public transport and bridge opening
schedules.
36. When you know more than 60 Olgas.
37. When it doesn't seem strange to publicly relieve yourself.
Disagree.
38. When the question... "Would you like fries with that?" has been
replaced by.."Would you like bread with that?".
39. When your soup arrives with sour cream in it and you like it.
40. When you go to a restaurant and you play with the kitchen cat.
41. When you realize you have eaten an entire plate of meat product
and not questioned its origin.
42. When your internet connection hits 40K and you are excitied
because it hasn't been that high in over a month.
Improving. No such thing in Moscow and broadbans is actively spreading in regions.
43. When you buy a bottle of Panteen Pro-V and you are shocked when
the shampoo that comes out IS actually Panteen Pro-V.
44. You stare at the innostrantsii (outsiders) wandering around town
45. You ride the marshrutka shouting 'ostanovite na ostanovke' EXACTLY where you want to stop, and not worrying about handing your money to the driver via 6 people
46. You don't think about wearing your stilettoes to the club... when it's -20 outside
47. You don't get it when your parents laugh if you order 'sock' (сок=juice) in a restaurant
48. You keep typing 'н' instead of 'n'
49. You appreciatively murmur 'bogatstvo russkovo iazika' (rich russian language) when you learn a new irregular plural
50. You actually start to use the prefixes with verbs of motion
51. You talk with your Russian neighbour about 'those Europeans' in the ballet interval
52. You are impressed with the new model Lada or Volga.
Never. We call them a comstruction set or "do-it-yourself" sometimes
53. You start to say oiy, akh, ekh
54. Your friend asks you how your day was and you shake your head and say 'voobshey'
55. You know which diminutive your friends prefer according to mood
56. You shove in front of that damn bab to get the last carton of kefir
57. You get suspiscious when someone smiles at you (rightly so).
here is what I have for this topic
58. You start measuring in km, kg, and, koneshno, sto gramms!
59. You realize that potato is a polezna and appropriate pirog filling
60. You join the queue at the ticket booth according to what time the tekhnicheski pererivs take place at each one
61. You mutter 'Дурак' at the idiot who forgot the gherkins when they bought vodka
62. You carry a plastic shopping bag with you "just in case".
63. You know you're going to miss everything so much when you leave
=)
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